Daily Archive

It is so strange to see Brangelina (usually so moody! so pensive!) like this…

My goodness, they seem to be enjoying themselves!  Will wonders never cease…

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     * 

If you liked this article check out This is What Fatherhood Should Look Like.

If you haven’t purchased your Journey necklace or made reservations at Chez FouFou, or you are chock-full of granny panties and have nothing alluring to adorn yourself with - never fear! 

It’s PersistentIllusion to the rescue.

1.  E-Card.  Go to Yahoo Greetings stat!  Not all of the cards are free, but it does leave you something to work with and since you, the slacker, have slacked, you have no grounds for excessive complaints.

Or, email them this.

 

2.  Old Skool Mixes.  I know you have a bajillion mp3s on your hard drive.  There must be something in there that we can work with.  All you need are 6-10 songs that ‘remind you’ of your loved one.  They don’t even have to be romantic!

Beastie Boys “Intergalactic Planetary”, Peter Gabriel “In Your Eyes” (then hold the stereo or remote over your head), your wedding song, anything by Nickelback, Dead or Alive “You Spin Me Around (Like A record)”, Devo “Whip It”   (only if they have a sense of humor!), Thomas Dolby “She Blinded Me With Science”, and Madness “Our House”.

And if you think I am picking a lot of 80s songs, you better believe it!  You want nostalgic music that will put your Beloved in touch with their happy place.

3.  Alternative Movies.  See if you can possibly rent “Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind” or “What Dreams May Come”.  Go, now, quickly to your local blockbuster.   They are probably setting aside ‘romantic’ movies as we speak! 

4.  Carpet Picnic.  Give up on Le Fancy Food. 

You wouldn’t want to make a reservation anyway, restaurants will be C-R-A-Z-Y.  Order chinese or pizza, and if you have some votives (mini-candles), light them!  Candlelight makes everything romantic. 

And don’t worry.  You may not have a fire, but the glow of the television will suffice.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     * 

If you liked this article check out Dawn of the Dean Presents: Massacre Your Valentine’s Day.

11.  The leader is always right.  Of course you know that can’t always be true but it didn’t stop me from telling my fiancee “It’s only fair to warn you.  I’m always right.” 

No matter who is involved in your life, it is still your life. 

The buck always stops with you.  Unless you are married, you are the only person who is ‘in charge’ of your life, because it is your life. 

12.  Rewards and punishment.  Don’t go out and buy a jet-ski if you haven’t upheld your commitments to yourself.  I am not suggesting that you flog yourself, however, you should put yourself on restriction if you mess up.

If you mess up and your life stays the same, then what (besides the niggling voice in the back of your head) will help you correct the behavior?

13.  Elite group.  Get membership in an elite group.  If you run marathons, then go to NYC one year and run the New York City Marathon.  Join Mensa.  Get a Masters degree. 

Do whatever it takes to belong to an elite group and stay there. 

Confidence and pride in yourself and your accomplishments can lead to happiness.  As long as you don’t have a conceited view of your own importance, taking pride in yourself will not lead to egotistical behavior.

14.  Dedication to ideal.  Whatever your ideal is, keep it firmly in front of your face daily. 

15.  Constant reminder of why.  Your ‘why’ has to be big enough to spark change.  Being healthy may not be a big enough ‘why’ to lose weight but avoiding death is.  Your why has a big job to do; it has to inspire you to interrupt your routine and break your habits.

In Isaac Asimov’s Foundation series, psychohistory is developed to predict and direct the actions of people in the future.  In psychohistory, to change the inertia of a quintillion people, you either need a lot of people or a small number of people with a lot of time.

The same is true for our lives, lives in which we are ultimately comfortable, if not happy.  Your life, your habits, your family, and your friends are factors which combined create a routine that is extremely hard to change.

 Your ‘why’ has to overcome the inertia of your life.

16.  Striving for perfection.  Sometimes we feel that ‘good enough’ is good enough. .

…

.

“Shoot for the moon.  Even if you miss, you land among the stars.”  

. 

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     * 

If you liked this article check out More Brainwashing You Way to Happiness.