Freedom is the power to choose how you want to live your life.
When we look at what prevents us from living our life, from freedom, there is one thing and one thing only. FEAR. Freedom is living without fear.
People fear a lot these days. We fear snakes, heights, global warming, abuse, accidents, being alone, change, lack of change, bacteria, losing our job, time, technology, decisions, being dependent, being independent, doctors, surgery, poverty, tornadoes, earthquakes, blizzards, lawsuits, love, lovelessness, divorce, progress, entropy, responsibility, sharks, strangers, terrorism, war, famine, losing our home, losing our family, being cheated on, getting fatter, getting older, and most of all, we fear death.
Your life is a near death experience.
I have been in two major car accidents and been strangled, twice. When I lost control of my car (thank you to the intoxicated driver of the other car) there was this split second of choice. I remember it so clearly, so intensely. It was right before my car plummeted off the side of the overpass at 60 mph.
I thought “well, this is it, there is nothing I can do” and I let go of the wheel and relaxed.
The reason I did that was because I had read reports about the reason drunk drivers survive accidents other people don’t. Allegedly it is because they are too drunk to be afraid and they don’t tense up so a drunk driver goes into an accident physically relaxed.
And it worked. I walked away with almost no damage to my person. Be it me, my car, or fate - I survived something that people usually don’t.
Deja Vu
With the next car accident, it was the same thing. I had done nothing wrong, but it didn’t change the fact that we were run over by a Greyhound bus. And again, I walked away without a scratch.
The next brush with death, I actually had longer to choose what I was going to do. Beyond facing death without fear, I chose to face death with love. To face my attacker with a smile on my face.
Face death with love.
It’s easy to fear in that moment. You don’t want pain, you don’t want to lose your life, you don’t want to die.
You may not have any control over whether you die, that choice may be in the hands of the person holding the gun or your neck. The only think you have control over is how you face death. Are you facing it in fear? Or in love?
Face life with love.
It’s interesting that we make fear based choices, even when our lives aren’t on the line, even when it is something as simple as how we look we can be afraid of what others think.
Give yourself the gift of facing your life in love. Start with yourself. Love yourself for exactly who you are in this moment, unconditionally. You don’t to be more ‘anything’ than what you already are.
You are perfect. Perfectly you. Open your heart to the truth of that and you can begin to lface life with love.
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May 12, 2008 at 6:50 pm
Robert
Hey Hayden, this is so inspiring, reading that you thought “well, this is it, there is nothing I can do” and I let go of the wheel and relaxed…
This is something I hope will be able to do when the time comes. I am actually getting ready all the time, in planes and car and everywhere, often thinking how I need to remember to relax and let go, let go. In my case it is actually not in order to survive but rather to die with the full awareness.
It may sound really insane, but I wish I was you in that split second of a choice you are writing about. OK, this does not sound too sane, but who cares. Next time when you go on a drive like that, take me with you…
And, of course, I deeply agree with what you are sharing.
p.s. Especially with the part telling me I am perfect. It is always good to hear that
persistentillusion says:
Haha! Robert, you are perfect. (Now you have it in writing!)
In my first accident it was so weird I had that response, so (pardon the pun) accidental. Something that I had read a loong time ago had been lurking in the back of my mind for just that moment. And popped into my head, just when I needed it.
Luckily, the universe gave me yet more chances to come to that point in the ‘right’ way.
I don’t recommend getting the crash course like I did, but you can always go do something that scares the bejeesus out of you. (Like skydiving or bunjee jumping.) Do something that terrifies you and do it with love. It isn’t quite the same, but as close as we are probably going to get. Meanwhile, you can justify skydiving costs to your Beloved. It’s a win-win!
May 14, 2008 at 2:48 pm
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